Chapter 2 - Preparations: Principle #2 - Building Confidence

Building Confidence



Most people are aware that confidence is one of the most important factors in meeting single women. How does one build up the confidence to approach women? Is confidence something that can be learned? Fortunately, the answer is yes. Even the shyest, most introverted individual can attain confidence by taking a few simple steps, and successfully increase the number of dates per week.


The important thing to remember is that confidence is a mental construct. It is both a feeling and a projected image. Single women are attracted to confident men, as most women want a man who appears strong for reasons of evolutionary biology.


Take the following steps to improve confidence:

Positive Thinking:

Positive thinking has a dramatic affect on an individuals personality and overall situation. Visualization is a form of positive thinking and is a useful tool. Before embarking on a mission to find single women, visualize a successful encounter and all the aspects that go along with one.

Fine Tune Your Appearance:

The good news is that women are less concerned with physical appearance than men. In fact, studies has shown that women prefer a man with more rounded features than a Brad Pitt-type chiseled-jaw for a relationship, as they feel the former is more trusting, committed, and less likely to cheat. However, women prefer a man who appears clean and healthy, again due to our evolutionary makeup.


A man should be clean shaven (the rugged mountain-man look is not as cool as you may think in most women's eyes), and if you have a pasty complexion, try to get some sun. Avoid greasy foods to ensure healthy looking skin, and get a least a little exercise to improve physical shape and appear more energetic. These steps will help you appear more healthy as well as build confidence.

Get Your Story Straight:

Maybe you feel that you are unable to get a date and meet single women because you fear that your social or economic status is too low. In this situation, you need to assess your faults and try to find a positive spin on each of them. When meeting single women, they will inevitably ask you some questions in order to determine your social and economic status. If you are in a situation that the women would consider unsatisfactory, your chances of dating her may be ruined. You must have a good answer to questions such as "why are you unemployed / don't have a car / still live with your parents, etc". The answer should not be a lie, but a positive and confident answer to a negative situation.

For example:

You don't have a car.
- Positive spin: You are doing your part to prevent global warming by taking public transportation. You prefer to take taxis so you don't have to worry about parking. Your friends always offer to drive you everywhere.

You are unemployed.
- Positive spin: You are taking some time off to work on your art / write a screenplay / write a business plan / Travel the world / Volunteer in Africa.

You work in a dead-end job.
Positive spin: You are saving enough money for medical school / You are close to being promoted to manager.

The point is, try to find a positive spin to a negative situation. Women respect a man with ambition, confidence and people generally prefer to be around more positive people.


Body Language

Confidence is also displayed with body language, especially posture. A person who is confident stands straight and tall with chest slightly protruding and shoulders slightly back. However, the posture must also appear relaxed, especially the shoulders. Analyze your posture frequently and correct any problems.


Confidence will not develop overnight. It must be nurtured regularly and fed like wood to a fire. It is essential to develop confidence , or at the very least, the appearance of confidence, if one is to be successful at meeting single women.